Sales this month

So, we're nearly at the end of March.

Before the Kybosh was put on sales of The Haunting in the UK (and bizarrely Australia) it was selling well. The total figures for March are

Paid:

USA - 262
UK - 194

Free
UK 197
Australia ! 5

In total - 656 copies gone out this month and about 200 last month.  That's quite good.

I got a one star rating as you know, but I've had two people email me to say it was fantastic. Who knows, I'm just glad they liked it.

Zventibold! Complete!

Here learn the tribulations of the boy-child Zventibold - how he rose from the grimy rags of his bastard birth to fight against injustice but how he was thrown down. How he turned to sorcery and raised the dead; how eventually he led an army of hamster men and kangaroo boxers to wreak vengeance upon his enemies. But there is more inside. Much more. 

Father murdered 
Step father murdered
Himself exiled
Only love ravished by his sworn enemy

Can he win her back?
Can right prevail?

Download this tale now. Every download helps good defeat evil.

Healthy Times - Hard Times

Went for a walk yesterday - here's some pictures:

I wanted to post these to say how much better I feel when I'm getting some fresh air. That and being Mindful. When I'm doing both of those things, the world is good. I learn to let go of things that bother me - like the 1 Star Review. In fact that's hardly on my mind at all now.

Funnily enough, I was reminded of it yesterday when I came home from my walk. After The Haunting

Stopped selling in the UK, I decided to make it free. This is what I'd always intended for this story anyway but when it started selling well, I thought I'd postpone the freeness thing. So I changed the price on Smashwords to free. Now, you should have to let Amazon know there's a cheaper price, but someone did it for me...

Does Amazon have a set of robots that search this stuff out, or as the helpful person who gave me my 1 star review done it to try and scupper me further.

Paranoid? Hmmm.

But since it became free about 16 hours ago it's shipped 60 copies so it's getting into peoples' hands and my hope is that someone will write a better review. Of course they might write more shit ones then I'll have to jump off the ridge featured above.

Not really. I'll not be ground down like pepper.

The Exorcist - My New Story

Here it is. Fresh meat. 

Laurent Binet: HHHH

Loved this book. It reads like a blog about someone writing a historical novel about the assassination of Heydrich in Prague. As such we have the writer's musings about what he should put in and some hints at his personal life - the mysterious Natacha for example. I enjoyed that "meta-novel" but I quite like quirky post-modern stuff. Binet calls it an Infranovel (in the Eng. translation anyway). The best bits are about the story of the heroic Czech resistance and the gut wrenching vileness of the Nazis. I will admit that I wept.

And guess what? He's got some 1 star reviews.

Moaning isn't attractive at all

Whining, moaning, complaining - that's not me.

Did I say about the one star review? It has totally killed sales in the UK.  And, it's unfair. I mean - "no direction" and "predictable" - you either don't know where you're going or you do.

I'm listening to Hawkwind so that makes me feel better. Also I think I have a bone in my mouth. This is probably good you're thinking - otherwise my mouth would be floppy and I couldn't eat. I had my tooth extracted the other day and they had to drill into the jaw. I think a fleck of bone is working its way out. They had to file the jaw bone smooth too so that maybe did it. Anyway the surgeon said I had a high pain threshold. I wish I'd taken that career as a bare knuckle fighter up now.

My daughter says I should get a tattoo 'cause I'd obviously laugh the needle off. But what kind of tattoo?

I know - I'll get that f****** one star review tattooed on my arse.

Falling like a stone...

So, this month up until the 1 star review (hiss, boo) The Haunting Sold 350 copies, and then after that, nothing. Dead in the water. I weep. I cry, but what can I do but write a better story?

So I am.

But that isn't why I wanted to blog tonight. I was discussing how our house would be quite good against a zombie apocalypse. It is part of a courtyard. At the top end there is a door onto the main street that you wouldn't know was there from the other side. Good. Zombies are unobservant and stupid. The other side there is a gateway for cars which is locked with iron gates and a car. My daughter said we could park the car against it and we'd keep them out for ages. We also have a secret room. Nuff said about that.

But then she said, "and we're close to the river and zombies can't swim...."

Bingo!  Of course they can't. Stupid, slow things that move with a total lack of coordination. How are they going to cross a river? How come no zombie series has thought of this before? How come the Walking Dead heroes didn't just blow the bridges???

The relief I am feeling now, is enormous. Just need to figure out how to keep the werewolves out and I will sleep easily for the first time in years.